Men are just happier people.
Why?
Here are some of the reasons:
1. Your last name stays the same.
2. The garage is all yours.
3. Wedding plans take care of themselves.
4. Chocolate is just another snack.
5. You can be President.
6. You can never be pregnant.
7. You can wear a white t-shirt to a water park.
8. You can wear NO shirt to a water park.
9. Car mechanics tell you the truth.
10. The world is your urinal.
11. You don't have to stop and think on which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
12. You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too yucky.
13. Same work, more pay.
14. Wrinkles add character.
15. Wedding dress $5.000. Tux rental $100.
16. People never stare at your chest when you are talking to them.
17. New shoes don't cut, blister or mangle your feet.
18. One mood all the time.
19. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
20. You know stuff about tanks.
21. A five day vacation requires only one suitcase
22. You can open all your own jars.
23. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
24. If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.
25. Your underwear is $8.95 for a three pack.
26. Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
27. You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
28. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
29. You only have to shave your face and neck.
30. You can play with toys all your life.
31. One wallet and one pair of shoes - one color for all seasons.
32. You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.
33. You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife.
34. You have a freedom of choice concerning growing mustache.
35. You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 for 25 minutes.
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